ADHD : Living with and Managing ADHD
ADHD is a condition that is now increasingly recognised and understood within UK society.
Whilst many people with ADHD acknowledge that it can be helpful at times - for example, by helping them solve complex issues creatively - it cannot be denied that the symptoms of ADHD can also sometimes negatively impact those living with the condition, and their immediate family or work colleagues.
A lifetime of living with ADHD can also lead to the development of Low Self-Esteem, largely because many children with ADHD were labelled by teachers and other adults in their lives as disruptive, annoying or lazy. Depending on the age of the individual when ADHD was first recognised, along their response to any medication prescribed, and the structures and routines that are in place in their day to day life, the extent of the impact resulting from their ADHD symptoms will vary.
I personally find a structured routine very helpful and rely on it to help me manage my life. As someone who has served in the Armed Forces, the NHS and the Police, clearly defined structures and operating procedures have always been an important aspect of my working life. Working in these sometimes stressful and always busy environments, taught me early in my career the importance of developing the skills needed to be generally well organised, mostly punctual, and to recognise when acting purely on an impulsive thought might be unhelpful. These are life skills which can be developed, learnt and applied to whatever situation an individual is in - whether they are studying at school, at university, in the workplace or the family home - and I regularly discuss them with clients in my counselling practice.
When I work therapeutically with individuals or couples impacted by the symptoms of ADHD, I always spend some time completing a thorough assessment to learn how the condition is affecting day to day life and the wider influence of it on the joint relationship and individual self-esteem. Any critical self-belief identified can be gradually changed, as people understand how their ADHD may have contributed to poor decisions or behaviours in the past and begin to see themselves in a different light, whilst also learning techniques to regulate their emotions and thinking patterns. This understanding usually brings positive changes to the individual with ADHD, whilst also increasing their ability to enjoy life and to thrive in relationships and the workplace.
The assessment will often highlight other important areas to explore, as well as particular interventions which can be taught in our therapy sessions to help individuals take control of problem areas. For example, the assessment might identify a need for strategies to help manage distraction or alternatively, a state of hyperfocus, which leaves family members standing outside the railway station, wondering why their loved one with ADHD has not arrived to collect them as arranged! Interventions to help reduce a tendency to be forgetful, disorganised or to frequently procrastinate or act impulsively are also commonly taught. As these strategies are implemented, we monitor the resulting decrease of problematic ADHD traits and the positive effects of this reduction on partners, wider family, and in the workplace.
These changes cannot all happen overnight, but with commitment, a supportive therapeutic environment and an increasing level of self-understanding, the symptoms of ADHD can become well managed, allowing everyday life to feel far less stressful and the experience of relationships and work much more positive and enjoyable.
If you would like to discuss the impact of ADHD on your own life, a partner’s or any other significant relationships, just get in touch for an informal, initial consultation.
